My Weakness...

I would rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ will rest upon me.
For when I am weak, then I am strong.

I am not perfect and will never boast that it is true. Never should my breath be wasted on trying to convince someone that I am better than what I really am.

If I don’t deal with my weakness properly then they will disqualify the power of my strengths.

Striving in my life is spent trying not to let the devil use my weakness for his purpose. The fear of rejection will not rule my life. I will not fear cultivating intimacy which further displays weakness.

We are divinely disabled by God. I am made incomplete by God’s design because I am made to need God. I don’t have a complete package: nobody on earth does. We all need God. God made women because he saw that men are incomplete without them. They need something they can’t provide for themselves. We need the opposite sex, we need each other, we need God, we need the body of Christ. Humans are made with the same need for God. There are things we can’t do for ourselves which require us to look to God for grace and strength. If we were actually perfect, then we would have no need for God and therefore shouldn’t waste our time worshiping Him.

I will not despise most the weaknesses God placed in my life that make me depend on him. He has to shine through in areas that aren’t taken up by me, places where I lack. God—on purpose—made me incomplete so His glory could shine through just so all would know that we couldn’t do it on our own.

When you notice the way you respond to the weaknesses of other people, its’ telling you what you think about your own weaknesses. If you are overly critical about the weaknesses or situations of other people, then you despise and can’t accept your own. If you are gracious with your own, then you will be gracious with others. God gives us grace for the weaknesses he made us with.

If I had a little magic wand to fix all my problems: maybe give myself endless wealth and comfort, by the time I was done waving that little wand, none of us would need God any longer. Only God alone can take my areas of weaknesses and make them areas of glory. His glory.

I will not live in defeated weakness. What knocks me down will not keep me down because God wants us to fight on. We should be eventually empowered by the trials that set us back.

I will not live in deceptive weakness. Jesus had more compassion on those who admitted their weaknesses. He called the Pharisees ‘white washed tombs” because they looked great on the outside to all who came near or knew of them, but they were thoroughly dead inside. They painted over their weaknesses. People hate hypocrisy and Jesus Christ dealt with it first hand because they thought they had no need for God.

Moses was lead to God by a burning bush. The bush never stopped being a bush. It just sat there an accommodated the presence of God. It converted a man who converted a nation who converted the world.

When God did what he came to do, the bush was still a bush. It didn’t become a rose bush. It didn’t become an oak tree. I want to accommodate the glory of God in my life, but there has to be room. There have to be ‘me parts’ missing. I don’t have to change to be something I’m not. It’s because ‘I’m not’ is the very reason God can use me.

There has to be some reason, some way in my life, that I need God.

I have divine weakness. His power is made perfect in it.

Thank you very much ladies, for the open conversation. May Biblical, open, respectful correction flow within our fellowship. To draw us first to our faces with God, then to open arms with each other, then extended hearts to the lost who see how we treat each other.

It's Public....

because I don't have anything to hide.

Since there is further interest in my previous blog, please allow me to further explain.

ACCOUNTABILITY
Stephen and I have a rule that I am not allowed in his room after 10 PM, no matter what. The door is never closed if I’m in there, no matter the day or the time or the subject matter. He has never entered my bedroom. Ever.

Our roommates (his 2 and my 3) are our active accountability partners who ask us the ‘Hard Questions’ pertaining to the purity of our relationship. We both have 2 close friends out of state who aid in keeping us accountable to our commitment to purity and give us advice. They are kept up to date but since they are not here locally, it is necessary to implement other forms of accountability to safeguard our relationship from a sin that so quickly entangles. All have been very active and do a wonderful job to keep us straight on a weekly basis.

Prior to our engagement, Stephen and I drafted a covenant between us and our Father to clarify lines of purity in our relationship. We signed it, made copies, and gave one to each accountability partner we had so they knew what questions to ask and by what guidelines we are following.

We both needed clear guidelines drawn so a healthy level of respect would be maintained throughout not only our dating relationship and our engagement, but into our marriage as well. The fight gets harder after marriage. Especially one centered on God. Satan hates that the most.

MORE DETAILS
Valentine’s Day was very special me and for Stephen. We looked at the scrap book I made for him in his room until 10:18 pm, and then his roommate came up and reminded us of the time! We were past due to move our get-together down stairs. Since Stephen hadn’t given me the rest of Valentines yet, he asked for permission from his roommates for an extension so we could have a little more time together, and told them what we were going to do. We had a time limit and guidelines to follow and we did just that.

Nothing happened during that time that we needed to ask for forgiveness for from God or from each other, and our accountability partners understand that the covenant we wrote and made with each other was kept. No disrespect was imparted. Nothing was touched that shouldn’t have been. Our relationship is healthy. One act of tender kindness from one adult to another which doesn’t break the laws God has set for our protection is permissible. This isn’t the case for anyone’s relationship at any time.

WHO IS IT FOR?
There are some people who couldn’t handle that level of temptation and Satan would have a green light to come in and do his work. There are some people who are too young to handle that kind of responsibility. Some relationships aren’t to that point yet either, when an intimate moment such as a massage in a romantic setting is appropriate. When there isn’t a definite plan to be married, such as between high schoolers and even some college students, it is not a good idea to share yourself this intimately with someone whom you are not planning to spend the rest of your life with.

As for writing about the happenings in my life: there is an appropriate level of sharing that can take place in a pubic setting that doesn’t embarrass anyone. You don’t know what that level is until someone lets you know that they were bothered with your details.

When I wrote my details about Valentines Day I had in mind grown female readers, my close friends, who know the standard to which Stephen and I keep our relationship. I’ll keep young readers in mind for future postings.

Valentines Day...

Well, yesterday was a good good day for me. Stephen and I were a little worried that we weren't going to be able to get time together until after 9:30 pm and we were right.

Bible Study Fellowship was last night and since I am a group leader, I am required to be there for my ladies, and I wanted to be there. It wouldn't be fair if they all made the effort to come and miss out on the festivities of the day, then I shouldn't eaither. God blessed our time.

During work yesterday I was having a converstaion with a coworker when I ansered the phone and it was Stephen. He said, "Hey babe, whatcha doin'? You might wanna go check your car out!" Oh, I ran outside and there I found in a vase a dozen light and dark pink long stem roses, a bear with a picture frame around his neck with Stephen inside (it was a picture I took of him the day we were engaed...when i took the picture he had his hand in his pocket on my ring and i had no clue!!!). And there was an awesome card too! I loved all of it! He's never had Valentines with a woman before. And not a man either! Just his friends and family, but this is different!

After bible study go out I went to his house to take him a scrap book of our 2005 together to him, and his card. He loved the book and the card, even though I had to take the book back to finish it! How tacky is that!!! I did want him to see it on Valentines Day and not get it late, even if it wasn't finished yet.

Then I learned that he wasn't finished gving me gifts yet!!! MORE? This is great! So he set the room up with aroma therapy candles and gave me a long massage with oils! Oh. My. Goodness! So sweet! Then, he gave me a new shirt to put on so I wouldn't get oil on my work clothes. It has a hat on the front of it and says, "What Would Ashton Do?" He thought it would be great for me to wear because his last name is Ashton!! It is referring to both Jesus and Ashton Kutcher. I'm sure you got that!

So I had a pretty good day! Tell me about yours!